One day not too long ago..2 Australian mamas were sitting on a back deck, sipping wine.. and talking up all the oxygen available.. when the conversation turned to life lessons.. and what they thought were the ones that certainly and without doubt needed to be learned. The two teenage daughters of the 2 mamas were, in turn, amazed, amused, and repulsed, by the words of wisdom tumbling forth from the mamas' mouths. These are, in no particular order, those words.

Monday, April 19, 2010

A car is a car is a car.  As long as it is reliable and yours, then there is no need to refer to it as “the Beemer” or “our Merc” or “my Benz”.  Truly.  We don’t care what you drive as long as you are sober and not on drugs when you drive it.

Personalised number plates = dicky.  Truly do you think we care if you have “NV”  on your car or “#1” or “mine” or “his” or “Babe” or “Classy”?  No we don’t.  And we will be very reluctant to let our baby girl into a car that has “PSSYWGON” on it.  Just so we are very clear on that.

Being a “cougar” is nothing to aspire to.  Truly, can you find enough common ground between you and someone over 20 years younger?  Really?  Great sex is not enough to sustain a long term relationship.  Trust us on this one.

Savour great sex while it lasts.  Great sex is replaced with good sex based on history, with occasional bursts of great sex.

Be suspicious of anyone who needs to tell you they have sex three or four times a week.  They are either lying or personality-disordered.  Best to avoid on any count.

Clean, crisp sheets and newly shaved legs = Bliss!

Buy new sleepwear every year.  It can come from a supermarket.

You can buy your knickers from the supermarket.  You do not need to pay $20 or $30 for a pair of undies.

Do not buy anything that has a brand name on it in an obvious place.  It really is a wank.

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